Kate Warren

fiction with humor and heart

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Excerpt

WeWriWa 14

12/21/2013

38 Comments

 
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Greetings ladies and gentleman.  Christmas is fast approaching and I almost forgot to post this.  Between preparations for the holiday (plus two birthdays) and my fibro hitting me hard lately, it's hard to keep track of everything.

But, the tree is up, the presents are wrapped, and here I am typing so no worries. 

Before I post my eight I want to take a moment to thank those who read and comment.  It means so much to writers to get feedback on our work.  Even just a few words can literally make our day.  So thank you for reading, and a double thank you for those who comment, review, email, etc. 

Now on to the Eight!  By popular demand I am continuing where last week's snippet left off in Chapter 5:







          “Jack?  Is that you?”

          Jackson gritted his teeth.  He hated it when people called him Jack, and strangers in his personal space calling him that was a particular pet peeve of his.  “Pizza delivery!” he called out, training his gun on the direction from which the voice had come.

          “But I did not order any, oh!”  The petite blonde stopped at the sight of a gun aimed at her head.  She put a hand to her heart and slumped against a wall, the red satin of her negligee riding up her thigh as she leaned. 




*************************




That's my eight for this week.  I'll see you around the internet between addressing Christmas cards and baking cookies.  And if we don't connect between now and then, Merry Christmas, Blessed Kwanzaa, Happy New Year, and a lovely whatever else you care to celebrate.




Kate


38 Comments

If We Make it Through December...

12/3/2013

0 Comments

 
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November has come and gone, and with it my participation in National Novel Writing Month.  This was a hard-fought victory over stress and circumstances beyond anyone's control.

Now is the time to take a break, but not too long a break.  I will go back to working on The DeFord Chronicles, Part II.  The goal is to finish, edit, and publish it in 2014.  If all goes well, North Pole: Confidential may also be finished, edited, and published before the end of next year.  But I don't want to set my expectations too high, as we never know what life holds in store for us in the future.

My family had a nice Thanksgiving with two exceptions: three of the kids were in various stages of sickness, and I burned one of my fingers due to an unnoticed hole in an oven mitt.


I hope everyone has been well in my absence, and I promise to attempt getting back to a normal posting schedule.  I also hope to resume my participation in Weekend Writing Warriors.  Been missing the WeWriWa crowd, and reading everyone's posts.

That's all for just now.  I'll post again next week, if not before.

Kate



0 Comments

A NaNo Update

11/23/2013

2 Comments

 
Here it is the final week of NaNo and I have not posted a single update about the event (or a married one either) on this blog.  What can I say?  Life got crazy.

This year I have fallen behind several times due to stress of the kind that takes away all creative ability.  Yes, it is said (even by me) that you should push through the block and just write something, but there are times when even that won't work.  I think most people feel this when worried about one of their children.  I won't post about all of that right now, we're still in the middle of it at this point, but I will in the future in the hope that I will be able to provide some help and hope to other parents who face similar issues.

Back to NaNo...  The novel this year is a Christmas-themed humor story called North Pole: Confidential.  It's the story of what really goes on up there, from Santa's fractured marriage, to disappearing elves, dirty cops, and a talking moose.  The main character, through whose eyes most of the story unfolds is Jackson Frost, an investigator from the states sent north to find out what happened to Santa's right hand elf, who's been missing for several weeks.  Other characters of interest include: Angel Claus, Santa's adopted daughter; Sergeant O'Hurley, grumpy local policeman; Mrs. Claus, a piece of work; Santa's colorful and coffee-loving assistant Donna; Angel's group of friends; and a little old lady called Teeny who is not what she seems.

I'll try to post an excerpt soon.  Perhaps the entire first chapter.  I rather like doing that.

Other NaNo happenings include my taking over as unofficial Municipal Liaison for my region, and running The NaNorphans Guild for mentorless newbies.  The Guild has been my baby for four years running now, having been recruited to run it my first year, during which I was a 'Norhpan.  I'm thinking it may be time to hand the reins over to someone else, as I've put in to be notified when applications open for next year's ML job.  I love doing both, but I probably need to choose one.

Time for a break, to get away from the computer after catching up on internet things that go by the wayside during the challenges of the week, and play a game with the kids. 
2 Comments

The second day.

11/2/2013

2 Comments

 
I've begun this year's NaNo and already done something I haven't done in previous years.  I started over.  Granted it's only the second day, and I'm keeping what I wrote before, but this is new for me.  I had a terrible time trying to write yesterday.  I just wasn't feeling it and this morning I figured out why: I started too early.  Not early for the event, but early for the story.  The title is North Pole: Confidential, but did I start in the North Pole? No.  I started with one character on a train.  Boring!  And if I'm boring myself how are the readers going to feel?

So I started over, after my character arrives at the pole.  And it's going much better.  The words are flowing, and I'm casting characters in my head.  The first beginning will be reworked and included later in the novel so that wasn't time lost either.

Now, a bit about the story for you:  Undercover detective Jackson Frost is posing as a writer planning a piece on the North Pole, but he's really there to investigate a disappearance.  Santa's right hand elf has gone missing just as they're gearing up for their busiest time of year.  Jackson will uncover secrets he never would have guessed about what really goes on at the North Pole: the Claus' troubled marriage, blackmail, union issues, financial problems, a cookie smuggling ring, and possibly even murder!

Just so you know this is a humor novel.  I've created an inspiration board on Pinterest (joined specifically for that purpose) and a playlist of YouTube videos to keep me in the holiday spirit.  I'll post links to these if anyone is interested, and I'll try to keep everyone updated on my progress.

Happy writing, and for those not writing, happy reading!

Kate
2 Comments

Cat days of summer.

7/2/2013

6 Comments

 
Because it's too early and not hot enough yet for the dog days. 

July has begun.  I don't know where June went, but Camp NaNoWriMo is on again.  I am attempting to participate once again, though with a much lower goal.  This is the second of the month and I have yet to write a word towards the 10,000 I am planning.

I wish I could offer some words of wisdom, sage observations, or witty remarks, but I'm not doing all that well lately with my fibromyalgia.  My internet activities have been sharply curtailed so that there are days I don't get beyond checking email.  So my time is spent with the kids, helping them as best I can, doing a bit of reading when time and headaches permit.  Finally saw Les Miserables and I almost immediately started rewriting the lyrics to form a condensed version.  I made a dress for my daughter out of an old t-shirt, and it didn't turn out too badly.  I've rearranged a few things in the house, but haven't made any major changes.  Oh, and I've designed the dream bathroom for when I win the lottery (note to self: might want to actually buy a lottery ticket once in a while, as this would improve chances of winning).

I am very sorry to report that the local bookstore is closing.  The owners have been great friends and supporters to me in my writing.  There are many who will miss having a bookstore, myself among them.  This is the second, or perhaps third book store the area has lost.  Makes me wonder if our town just isn't big enough, or big enough on reading.  A sad happening regardless.

Switching to a more pleasant topic, for the upcoming holiday we'll be having a small cookout.  My husband will try out his new (used) grill and I will provide the potato salad and balloons stuffed with colorful confetti in lieu of fireworks.  We will also watch 1776, as has become our yearly tradition.

Here's to all my friends across the internet: writers, readers, artists of all kinds, and those who just like cruising websites.  Hope you're all having a wonderful summer.  And to those in America, have a safe and enjoyable Independence Day.

Kate
6 Comments

Valentine's Day Giveaway!

2/12/2013

24 Comments

 
In honor of Valentine's Day some people give others a box of chocolates, or a dozen roses.  Me, I'm giving away a dozen free eBooks. 

Why am I doing this, you ask?  Is it because:
A) I'm desperate for attention and acknowledgment. 
B) My heart of gold longs to share with others.
C) It's a clever ruse to increase my blog traffic, which in turn will feed my plans for world domination.
D) All of the above.
or E) Who cares? Free eBooks!

I'd like to remind the reader that there is no wrong answer to this question. 

All you have to do to enter to win one of a dozen eBooks of my bestselling* novel Bridging The Gaps  is read the excerpt below and leave a comment with your email address.  Of course if you want to blog, tweet, facebook, email or otherwise tell all of your friends about it, that would be nice, but it's not necessary. 


The excerpt is a Christmas scene because the Valentine's Day scenes have major spoilers and I thought I should stick with a holiday:



          Three knocks had signaled Ellen’s arrival at Henry’s apartment.  He shut the door and pulled her into a long, slow kiss, then released her and went to pour the wine.  She leaned against the door for a moment and looked around. 
           Henry’s place was larger than she’d expected.  Stephanie’s entire apartment could fit in his living room. Of course Henry could afford all this. He’d decorated mostly with mistletoe; it was everywhere.  There was an artificial pre-lit tree in one corner with a few ornaments and a silver tinsel garland. 
          “Here you are.”  He handed her a glass of wine.  “Would you like to watch a movie?  I have a nice selection of rented DVDs here: It’s a Wonderful Life; White Christmas; Mrs. Claus and the Very Naughty Elves.”
          She laughed and sat down.  “How about some music?”
          “Coming right up.”  He put on an instrumental holiday CD he’d found in the bargain bin at a local store and sat down next to her.  “So…do you come here often?”
          “No.  This is my first time.”
          “Well let me give you the tour.”  He stood and held out a hand to her, which she took obligingly.  They walked slowly through the apartment.  “This is the living room.  That’s the kitchen.  Here’s the bathroom.  A spare room I’m not using at the moment.”  
           They came to the last door and Ellen opened it. Glancing back at him she went in the room and settled on the bed.  “Won’t you join me?”
          “Hell yes.”  He downed the rest of his wine and left the glass on a table in the hallway. This time she didn’t mention the language.  He sat next to her and pulled pins from her hair, setting them on the bedside table. Then he put an arm around her and just sat.
          “Henry?”
          “Yes?”
          “Aren’t you going to unwrap your present?”
          “You mean it’s not going to unwrap itself?”
          “It’s an old-fashioned present.” 
          “Oh, I see.  Well then I’d better get to work.”



That's it.  Leave a comment before 11:59 pm US Central Time on the 14th.  Winners will be chosen by random drawing.  Spreading the word, or saying nice things about the excerpt will not improve your chances of winning but will endear you to me greatly. :o)

Kate

(*among novels set in Wisconsin and featuring one or more dentists in a romantic role)




 
24 Comments

Happy 200th, Pride & Prejudice!

1/28/2013

2 Comments

 
Ladies and gentlemen, readers and Austen fans of all ages,

We all know this is a special day for Jane's most popular novel.  In celebration I am posting the personal ads I created for the main characters several years ago.  I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them.



Wickham:  Single white scoundrel seeks sweet young thing for weekends of fun in the sun. Interested parties send picture and 10 pounds to __________.

Darcy: 
Serious single man of means requires a woman of grace, intelligence, and spirit for witty banter and humbling declarations. Hoping for a societal equal, but willing to slum if the heart demands it. Please send resume.

Elizabeth: 
Nothing but the deepest love will induce me into matrimony. Are you game? Looking for a man who can hold his own in conversation, is loyal and truthful, must dance. Poets need not apply.

Caroline: 
Single society goddess seeks man of good fortune and exceptional taste. Must possess an excellent mind, a healthy appreciation for cleavage, and be named Fitzwilliam Darcy. Applicants from Derbyshire given preference.

Collins: 
Humble man of the cloth seeks woman of beauty and means to make his life worth living. If you like compliments, then I am the clergyman for you. I can offer a most excellent situation courtesy of my most noble and condescending patroness Lady Catherine de Burgh, and once my cousin takes his leave of this earth I will inherit an estate near Meryton. I should be most happy to obtain the hand of any lady who is handsome, charming, and willing to give me the time of day. I will do anything my lady requires. I'll be your devoted slave. I'm desperate. Please! 

Charlotte: 
Happiness in marriage is a matter of chance, so take a
chance on me. I'm not choosy and would prefer a man who is open to suggestions from a most amiable wife. I'm a no nonsense lady with low expectations in life. You will gain a sensible wife of good family who is willing to overlook how annoying you are in exchange for security and relative peace. Also I have a hot best friend you can drool over.
 
Jane: 
Reserved young lady with embarrassing family seeks amiable young man to take me away from it all. Looking for marriage and 10 children. Must be able to tolerate frequent visits from silly mother-and-sisters-in-law. Please get me out of here. I do hope mother doesn't see this ad.
 
Bingley: 
Handsome young man of very reliable means seeks blooming country angel. This knight is ready to ride to your rescue. Likes music, loves to dance. Prefers mysterious shy quiet beauties. Let me be your Romeo and I guarantee a happy ending.
 
Lydia: 
Silly white female of youthful and playful disposition seeks fun-loving adventurous type. Must be dressed in regimentals, and generous with flattery. Willing to try anything once. Call me.

Mary: 
Intelligent, spiritually minded young lady seeks man of integrity for quiet evenings of prayer and reflection. Must possess a thorough knowledge of Scripture. Latin and Greek skills a plus. Would prefer a clergyman, but let's face it they're not exactly beating down the door. Preference given to individuals from Meryton, as I do not like to travel. Interested parties please write an essay on the virtue of purity and the family life, 1000 words minimum.
 
Kitty:  
Young lady who is not as silly as I used to be wishes to find a handsome young man of character, as father will not consent if I do not choose a sensible man. Prefer to live in or near Derbyshire to be close to my sisters Mrs. Bingley and Mrs. Darcy as I no longer speak to my sister Mrs. Wickham. Why did she have to get married before I did? I'm older. Would like wedding trip to Brighton.
 
Maria Lucas:  
Younger sister of realist, daughter of a knight, seeks handsome man who does not drone incessantly. Having seen the match my sister made leads me to believe that it would be best to marry a man from far away, therefore I would like to start a family in Wales or Scotland if possible. Would like intelligent man, wealth not a problem for me, but mostly just want to be loved and cherished. Sincere gentlemen may apply to my father Sir William Lucas for his approval before courting my favor. Prefer Col. Fitzwilliam type.

Lady Catherine: 
Dominant matriarch seeks submissive man of fortune and breeding for companionship and role-playing. Applicants must show investment portfolio, possess excellent taste in music, art, and literature, speak 5 languages, and have own whip. Send pedigree to Rosings Park, Kent for consideration. 

Anne de Burgh:  
Gentle young lady of delicate constitution is searching for a handsome and romantic doctor of good family to get me the hell away from my domineering mother. Must not intimidate easily. I am pale and shy, but my dowry will make up for that. I may be a late bloomer, but I intend to learn quickly. Prefer to reside in or near Bath. Your caged bird awaits. Must understand metaphors.
2 Comments

Broken hearts.

12/16/2012

8 Comments

 
Hello all.  As you probably know by now I did not post for Six Sentence Sunday despite signing up for it.  I just couldn't.  Too much heaviness in my heart, and I was actually asleep past the deadline.  I have a migraine today and my daughter is sick and was up in the night.  Not fun, but at least I have her and my boys.

I keep thinking about the little girl from Sandy Hook Elementary school named Emilie.  She had the bluest eyes and was only a year older than my Emily.  I keep thinking about Victoria Soto, the first grade teacher who hid her students in closets and cabinets and told the shooter that they were in the gym, giving her own life to save theirs.  I keep thinking about the parents, the siblings, the pets even who won't see those smiling faces again.  Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends and neighbors whose lives will be forever changed.  A community in shock and in mourning. 

There is no good time for such a thing to happen, but the holiday season is by far the worst.  Presents will go unopened and decorations have even been taken down.  Celebrating anything in such an atmosphere will be difficult, if not impossible, for those who have lost loved ones.  Some families will pull together because of this tragedy, and some will be ripped apart, adding more heartache and more tears.

I pray for everyone affected.  My heart aches for the lives cut short and the families devestated.  I imagine those beautiful children being gathered into Jesus' loving and protecting arms and it eases a little of the sting. 

There weren't six sentences in any of my work that felt appropriate to post today.  I'm sure you understand, and I hope you will visit the other authors who did post for Six Sentence Sunday.  I will.  I'm hoping some of them posted their funniest lines because I could use a reason to smile or laugh. 

Kate
8 Comments

And now for something completely different...

12/8/2012

35 Comments

 
Ah, Six Sentence Sunday!  Feels like home.  It's been a long time since I've participated, but I'm back now.

Well NaNoWriMo was a busy time, as usual, and many of my usual internet-based activities fell by the proverbial wayside.  However, I managed to win, so I'm happy.

While my latest release, Bridging The Gaps makes a wonderful Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, New Year's or other holiday or birthday gift, since I've been working on something else this week's six will be from my current WIP. 

Ladies and gentlemen I give you six sentences from the as yet incomplete first draft of The DeFord Chronicles, Part II, sequel to (that's right, you guessed it) The DeFord Chronicles, Part I.  I will choose this week's six via my random scrolling method partly because it has worked so well in the past, and partly because decision making is not one of my strengths today.  So from chapter 13 I give you the following:

Scene: Chauncy DeFord and his friend Sir James Quinly are preparing to leave the home of Chauncy's cousin in France.  James is complaining that Chauncy did not warn him about the ladies of the house and their enthusiasm for male company.  Chauncy speaks first here.   (please note this takes place in the year 1422)



          "How did you manage to put them off?”
          “I told the first that I had taken a vow of chastity, and breaking it would result in my immediate death. With the second I invented a dread plague that could be caught by kissing.  The third nearly overpowered me.” James shuddered at the memory.  “It was only feigning that her uncle would be arriving presently that saved me from Lady Chrestienne.  Praise God she did not stop to wonder why Monsieur Baricaud would be visiting my chambers [at night].”



That's my six for the week.  Be sure to visit all the other wonderful authors at Six Sentence Sunday.

Kate

35 Comments

Six Sentence Sundays 5/13/12

5/13/2012

26 Comments

 
Happy Mother's Day to all and a big thank you to my readers and commenters.  I was going to continue with another bit from Chapter 8 but then I thought I should post something more in keeping with the holiday.  

From Chapter 1: Ellen has returned home from lunch with friends, following her earlier anti-Doug rampage, and finds that her eldest daughter is completely on her side and has done a little rampaging of her own in a show of solidarity.  


     It looked like a tornado had hit a men’s haberdashery and deposited its findings all over the backyard: a jacket snagged on a rosebush; a pair of pants hung from a tree branch, undershirts lounged on the hydrangeas. 
“Stephanie!  You did this?”
     “Uh huh.”  
     They stared at each other for a moment before bursting into laughter.  Ellen pulled her daughter close.  “You are wonderful!”


Shared anger can be such a wonderful bonding experience.  Be sure to visit all the other Six Sentence Sunday authors. 
26 Comments
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